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Hi! I'm Dr Petra.
I'm a psychologist based at University College London and I research sex and relationships. Fire away and ask me what you need to know. Don't be embarrassed - I'm here to sort out all your awkward, personal, and just plain confusing problems |
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| This is kind of personal but i am finding it really difficult to cope at the moment. Since year 6 of school i was bullied and from then on i was constantly, in a way i got used to it. By end of year 8 beginning of year 9, a teacher started to abuse me in about all ways possible! He never raped me, and i am thankful for that, but it still doesn’t deserved to be let off! He would always make fun of me in class, put me down, he would even make me sit near him and not near my friends! When he kept me behind he would rub my shoulders and back in a sleezy way, he made me uncomfortable. I tried to tell my friends and teachers but they laughed and just said i had a crush on him! It got worse as it went on, he would wink at me in the corridors and would always be involved in any of my lessons, but yet he still made me out to be the bad person! i finally changed schools because i knew this would effect my exams! The problem now is no one close to me knows about this, not even my parents. They thought i moved because of the kids bullying me. But now i am 17, and have a wonderful boyfriend but he wants to go further i told him i'm not ready and he respects that but also recently i was almost sexually assaulted by an older man on holiday, and it brought it all back to me! Yet i can't tell anyone because my mum is seriously ill herself! What do i do? i can't keep this bottled up i have already suffered years of abuse before i don't want it to effect my future as well. |
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| If you’ve experienced abuse in the past it’s not surprising this will affect your future relationships and make it difficult to be intimate with someone in a way you feel in control of. This is even more likely to be a problem in cases where you’ve not been able to tell anyone – or been ignored when you have disclosed abuse. In order to move forward I think you’d benefit from some professional support. You can ask your GP to refer you to a counselor. Your doctor and any counselor you see will treat what you say in complete confidence – so you can tell them how you feel. ChildLine may also be able to advise you on how to manage your feelings – and whether or not you can take any action against the teacher. Find out more at their website http://www.childline.org.uk or call their confidential (and free) helpline on 0800 1111. |
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